Years ago, a friend of mine told me about a consultant he hired to help with a project. The consultant was a bit direct and somewhat aggressive. It put my friend off. Then, the consultant uttered the magic words:
“You can believe me now, or you can believe me later. Either way, you will believe me.”
We can translate that into “the best way to communicate a lesson is to learn it the hard way.”
In my newly discovered hobby of pottery, there are plenty of resources online to show techniques, answer questions, or simply display art. There are also plenty of people offering advice. Good advice. That I often ignore.
Like, “be careful handling your pottery before you bisque fire it.” Good to know. I ignored it. And then, after putting the finishing touch on a green mug, it squeezed it a little too hard and it disintegrated in my hands, not unlike what happens when you bite into a Taco Bell taco. And now, I’m REALLY careful handling greenware.
Or “when drying your pottery, make sure the room isn’t too cold or the moist clay might crack.” Wow, thanks for the advice! Which I promptly ignored. And it resulted into 3 hand-built coffee mugs splitting down the side, completely ruining them, and flushing 3 hours of work down the toilet. Needless to say, I dry the mugs out now in a warm environment.
As a parent, and now as the child of an aging parent, I often feel like my suggestions or ideas are ignored. My kids probably think I’m irrelevant and my mom thinks I’m controlling and irritating. But anything I suggest for anyone is for their own good. And it’s often ignored.
You’ve probably experienced the same thing at work or at home. If so, I’m learning, just as I have with pottery, or and as my friend did with the consultant, that nothing communicates a lesson like experiencing it in real time.
So that’s my advice for today. Stop whining, harping, insisting, cajoling, etc. If it’s not working, learn to let go and let the Universe communicate the lesson. Trust me, it’s a much better teacher.
